Change

CHANGE.  As a noun:  the act or instance of making or becoming different; the substitution of one thing for another; an alteration or modification; a new or refreshingly different experience.   As a verb:  make or become different; to make or become a different substance entirely; transform.

"A change has come over me

He changed my life & now I'm free.  

I'm not who I used to be. I'm so glad He changed me.  

A wonderful change has come over me."

It's that time.  That birthing time.  All of the changes, transformations, healing of wounds.... is about to give birth and launch "a new & refreshingly different experience."   It's time to move on.  Our time here is up.  Apprehension and eagerness...... in the same mind? Yes.  But God is able to carry me to the other side.  To that place of our own.  I don't need to fear.  He's a big God.  I don't serve a little God.  I serve one that is fully capable.... Roadblocks, impossibilities, hinderances.... illogical, unthinkable, improbable..... matters naught to Him.   It's time to move. 

He would not tell me to step off into the dark unknown unless He fully intended to bear me up on eagle's wings.  Trusting Him is imperative.

I don't trust myself.  My weaknesses, no.  My body, no.  My emotions, big NO.  My thoughts, no.  I've been wrong so many times.  Fully believing.....in what I was believing.  My ability.  My way of producing outcome....and income.  My own eyes and understanding.  Societal codes.  

I've prayed and believed.  Claimed and proclaimed.  Looking foolish.  Changing my mind.  Unstable?  I don't know.  Afraid of such?  That I do know.   God says... God doesn't say... God told me.... I'm not sure it was Him..... Doubts.  Confusion.  Embarrassment.

"But when you ask God, you must believe and not doubt.  Anyone who doubts is like a wave in the sea, blown up and down by the wind.  Such doubters are thinking two different things at the same time, and they cannot decide about anything they do.  They should not think they will receive anything from the Lord."  {James 1:6-8} 

God never changes.  His Word remains the same.  It doesn't shift with emotions.  Anxieties sway it not.  Man's blunders won't shake it.  If He says it in His written word, it is true.  Without fail.  My understanding of Him may falter.  My inept means of assuaging my own pain may fall short.  But God........ unchanging.  Rock Solid.  Immoveable.  Lover of my soul.  Husband to the husband-less.  A father who never leaves.

I am both mother and father to my brood.  Do I have what it takes?  Will my past failures come to repeat themselves? Can I alone protect and preserve them?  Can I cover them? 

No, not alone.  Never alone. Jesus is an ever-present help in time of need.  But deeper still... He is a King who cares for His princesses and princes.  We are royalty.... because He is royalty....because of the blood covenant of the spotless lamb.  He is ever-present.... always there.... 24/7, 365.  Never sleeping.  Always interceding.  Watching.  Protecting.  Loving. Warring on our behalf.  Master.  Savior.  Jesus.

It is not about me.... it's about Him.  It's always about Him.

"He must become greater and I must become less important." {John 3:30}