Joyful in Hope

I feel hopeful with possibility! In life, love, work..... It's that feeling of getting to the end of a long, arduous journey and knowing that your resting place is just up ahead. Not the END of the journey (because our journey ends when we see Jesus, face to face) but a place to rest, refresh, refuel, unload....

That's what I feel....like I am right on the precipice of a breakthrough from God. I can feel it. And I like this feeling of hope. And optimism. And trust. And faith. And of being TRULY LOVED by One who will never abandon me or think I'm not good enough for His attention or love. Good things are ahead and I feel that even at this moment, there's something going on behind the scenes in certain areas of my life that only God knows about (because He is orchestrating it) and when the time is right, HE will bring it to fruition. HE will take of me and the kids, as He always does. Things are falling into place in key areas.....in a calm, contented fashion.

I remember years ago (you know, a 100 yrs ago when I was a young woman. lol) teaching in a class about worry and anxiety. I was thinking about the word, "wrest". The definition says: "to forcibly pull something from a person's grasp" and " to take something (esp. power or control) from someone after considerable effort or difficulty". And I thought of times (or things) where I tell God, "I got this. I can do it myself" when He's asking me to give him my burdens. He tells me to let go and I smile, through clenched teeth, "no...really...I've. got. this...". Why do we do that? Seriously. So, if you take the 'w' out of 'wrest'....you have REST. Ahhhh. What does the 'w' stand for? WORRY. THAT'S why we do it. We worry too much. And when we worry too much, we don't let go of things. We think (okay, so maybe it's just that I think. lol) that we can fix it ourselves. You know, we don't want to appear weak and rely on God for every dang thing, now do we?

So here's to putting an end to "wresting" and focusing more on "resting". Often God strips us of everything, leaving us cold and naked, without our stability or security (in whatever we think that comes from)....empty-handed.....so that He can fill us up (our lives, our character) with what HE wants.

"We are the clay, You are the Potter. We are all the work of your Hand"
We are works in progress. And in that process, he is forging more of His character in us.....it hurts sometimes, it burns, it irritates...but it is important and shouldn't be circumvented.



I look sooo tired and haggard in this picture. It was 2 months before I delivered Aidan, prematurely. I had no idea what was in store for me or that I even had cardiomyopathy or polyhydramnios. I didn't know if I was going to deliver this baby alive. I didn't know that the baby and I would be fighting for our lives, literally. I didn't know that the love of my life and the father of my children was going to walk out in 8 months and never return. I didn't know a lot of things. I just knew that I could do nothing but trust God. And in the end, He did amazing miracles in mine and Aidan's lives. And continues to do so in mine and the kids' lives. We are all growing closer to Him and that is the most important part. Since this picture was taken, 2 of my children have asked Jesus into their hearts, 2 have gotten baptized and 1 has renewed his relationship with his Lord. My own faith has increased exponentially (Teri, that was for you. :-) ). I'm glad that God doesn't let us see too many steps ahead. I am a stronger person now than I was then. Even though, sometimes, I don't see it. I feel vulnerable and weak. But God's Word says, "in your weakness, I am strong".