Guidance from My Alarm Clock

I was putting Aidan down for a nap on my bed.  I looked at the clock and it said - 12:21.  When I saw it, I thought, "I Cor. 12:21" but had no clue what it said (I like to play games with myself like that. lol).  So I look it up and here it is: 

"The eye cannot say to the hand, "I don't need you!" And the head cannot say to the feet, "I don't need you!" "

Very interesting.  Angela was giving me a "talkin' to" the other day about something along these lines.  I have a tendency to shelter myself when I feel like my life isn't lining up in "acceptable" ways.  I pull back from friends and family because I get embarrassed about the mess my life is.  I feel like I should have it more "together" than I do.  I feel like I should be able to do this all by myself... no help ... and I get mad at myself, wondering why I can't.

Hm, isn't that interesting.  Angela was giving me a "talkin' to" just the other day about something along these lines.  I have a bad habit of sheltering myself away when I feel like my life isn't lining up in an "acceptable" way.  I feel way too vulnerable to risk criticism or judgmental-ism.  I get embarrassed when it's not all together YET.  It should be by now.  I should be able to do this by myself. Why is that so hard??


Welllll .... it's because that's not how God designed His Body of believers.  We are each a part.  Sometimes, I feel like I'm just a "receiving" part and can't imagine what I could possibly have to give.  Most of the time, I just feel like the toenail on the baby toe or an eyebrow hair or something seemingly insignificant.  And then there's the "hands" and the "left-side of the brain" constantly coming to my rescue .... because I stubbed the baby toe and half the toenail came off or the eyebrow hair turned gray and is sticking out at some weird angle .... I want to say, "Stop helping me.  I should be able to fix this/solve this/plan this/pay for this by myself."  But the truth is:  I can't.  I have to accept that.  I have to allow God to take care of me through whatever part of the Body He sends a signal to.  It's just how it is. I can't fight it .... and God knows I try my damnedest to fight it .... but it's futile.